As I sit here trying to figure out how to present the theme for this month I am realizing a certain reluctance within me to just ‘lay it out there’. Tell it like it is, even though there will be some who will think me cold, callous, indifferent, or perhaps a bit naive. When you look at the work we have been doing since the beginning of the year/end of last year, you can see the energetic movement taking place all around you. You can see the shifts and changes happening in everything … and everyone. No one is untouched by these changes … yet, there are those that wish to ignore, deny, or lament their inability to embrace what is happening around them.
September is the month of accountability … being accountable for your own thoughts, words, deeds and actions. Accountable for your own life, the world you choose to occupy, and the burdens you choose to carry. It is the time when you must step up and own what you have created … and are creating. It is that time in which you separate from those burdens that do not belong to you, and leaving them for their true owners.
This is the time to learn how to hold your own responsibility, while letting others hold their own. But how do you separate the two? How do you not take on someone else’s burdens? How do you separate what you are accountable for and what you are not accountable for?
Growing up we have heard stories and were told about the rewards and benefits of helping others. For example, parents are naturally accountable for their children. From the time the child is born until they reach a state of being a young adult … parents are accountable for all that goes into the upbringing of the child, including all aspects of providing for their good health and personal well-being. Later in life, the roles may reverse … where the children may become the caregivers of their aging parents. We see this quite often today with the aging of the ‘baby boomers’. The question becomes, where do you draw the line? What areas fall into your accountability?
You are accountable for your commitments. Having children is a commitment you made. Agreeing to be a caregiver to someone who is ill or aging, is a commitment. You may have financial commitments that you have entered into.
You are accountable for your own health and well-being. No one can tell you how to live, eat, exercise or take care of yourself. Doctors may pressure you to take a preventative medication or a prescription … but it is ultimately your choice as to whether or not you will take the medication and take it as directed. How you want to manage and maintain your own health is up to you.
You are not responsible or accountable for the way other people manage or maintain their health … unless you made a commitment to oversee and manage that for them. But ultimately, unless they are completely unable to make conscious decisions for themselves, they are accountable for their own health and well-being.
You are accountable for your life choices and actions. Even if someone pressures you to do something that you instinctively know is not a good idea, you are accountable for your choice and action. If someone pressures you to join a gym with them and you do it, you are accountable for the financial obligation you entered into. If you pressure someone into trying something that you know will not be a healthy choice for them, you are accountable for forcing your own agenda onto them, but they are ultimately accountable for their own choice and action.
You are accountable for your own attitude. No one can fix your inner psyche … only you. If you choose to live the life of a victim, placing blame on everyone or everything in your life, seeing the glass as half empty with no future potential, then that is your own doing. “What you put out, is what you get back” is an old saying that has been true since the beginning of time. If the energetic shift and changes that are taking place all around you are not happening in a positive and productive manner, it is because of you and the choices you are making.
Let’s look at this another way. We talk about ‘our path’ and where that ‘path’ might be leading us. We know that when we ‘walk our path’ we walk it alone … no one can walk it for us, it is something we have to do for ourselves. And, we know that we cannot walk someone else’s path for them … they must do that for themselves.
Let me ask you these questions. If you believe that we are all unique, how can you assume to ‘know’ what is best for someone else? If you believe that we all come here with lessons to learn, karma (good and bad), past lives influencing our very Being, and a path we must walk for our own growth and evolution … would you want to give that to someone else to handle? Would you want to deny or take away that opportunity from someone else?
Some of you may have someone that is your teacher, mentor or spiritual guide who helps you along the way. This person may help you interpret or better understand what is happening in your life, lead you to experiences you otherwise might not have had, or simply listens to you as you work your way through your own understanding. This person may be able to give you some insight into other ways of processing information or seeing things from a different perspective.
What this person does not do for you is take on your responsibility. They will ‘walk beside you’ along your path … but they will not (and cannot) walk it for you. They will watch over you and guide you as you work through your life issues … but they will not do the work for you. They will listen as you speak of your burdens, offer ways to lighten the load, but will not carry the load for you.
The greatest lessons in life come from experiences. Think about your own experiences and the lessons you learned from them. List each of the experiences that stand out in your head on the left hand side of a piece of paper. After you have done that, go back, and on the right hand side of the paper, list the lessons you learned from each of those experiences. What you will find is that the right hand side of the paper is a much longer list than the left. Because you were engaged in the experience, it touched many aspects of your life and understanding. If someone else was walking your path for you, having the experiences, your list on the right hand side of the paper would be blank.
We cannot walk our children’s path. We cannot walk the path of our parents, friends or loved ones. We can only walk our own. We are accountable for our own life and the world we choose to create and inhabit. To try to carry the burdens of someone else is to deny them their own experiences and the opportunity to learn from them.
As you continue creating your ‘new’ world … the one that is a true reflection of you and your full potentiality … let go of those burdens that do not belong to you. Don’t try to fool yourself by believing you are doing someone else a favor, or that you have ‘no choice’ but to do this or that. You ALWAYS have choices! Everything in your life is a choice! Don’t bring any of the old burdens, beliefs, choices or pressures into these final few months of this year. Free yourself of those things you do not want, nor are able to be accountable for! 2014 will be the year of realization … realizing the fruits of all you have done this year. So finish what you have started!